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Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Chuck Norris Facts

I know these have been around for awhile, but I happened across a link to the page again today and it is still one of the funniest things I have seen. For all of its pitfalls the internet did a wonderful thing by bringing us the "CHUCK NORRIS FACTS" Check them out and post your favorite in the comments.

Currently this one is my favorite

"If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you."

5 comments:

Jeff said...

Even though they have been out for a while they are still frickin hilarious. I think my favorite so far (I haven't read them all yet) is "Chuck Norris is like a dog, not only because he can smell fear, but because he can piss on whatever he wants."

The Milk Crate said...

when superman goes to bed, he wears chuck norris pajamas...

kara said...

I have 2 favorites that weren't on this list:
1. Once a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris. Chuck showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die.
2. A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.

kara said...

One more...
Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't f*** with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf.

Scott said...

I like the blind man one, that was pretty funny.